Holy shitsicle, Batman, I do believe we have a stalker on the radar.
Nice work tho dude, otherwise.

Actually, looking at those last two sentences, I sound like a total shallow use-them-for-sex kinda dude. So I'll restart. Firstly, Nice Work getting a girl but turning down unwarranted sex. Although... eh. I'm currently in two minds concerning the sex thing - on the one hand: you're both drunk and sex would be UnGentlemanly. On the other: we're young ergo we need to have the sex now. While we can. I'm currently tending toward answer Numero Uno. See, it's consentual, you ain't forcing it on them and you damn sure ain't using them. Hell, you're just being used. Bitch be acting all feisty, you best believe she got something she liked.
On the other hand - daaaaaamn.
Question: Hot? Not? A "Hot but eh not kinda when sober" thing? Inform the thronging masses and myself.
And bitch - "outside influence" - dude, I saved your ass. Steve woulda hauled in there and shit woulda gone down.

Note: I saw Bad Boys 2 tonight. Hence the 'Hood lingo.

Hold up - Just got a text message from Emily. "Work was awful, am beginning to see how much I miss everyone, am very lonely." To recap: I leave for university tomorrow and I doubt I'll see Emily, pretty much the only girl I like and can conceive of liking, ever again.
God, if you're out there, I hope you're enjoying this sick, sick little practical joke 'cause when I get to Heaven, your ass is mine. I gonna stick 10 commandments of my own directly up your celestial ass, bitch. How about "Thou shalt not fuck with someone for the hell of it."